Do you have any friends, family, or coworkers who are negative all the time?
You’ve probably experienced the side effects: exhaustion, a drop in mood, and destructive energy. Being around pessimistic people is draining.
Whether it’s a colleague who does nothing but complain about the job or a friend who creates drama in your group of acquaintances, we’ve all had to deal with someone who is always negative.
If you’re not careful, they can pull you into their negativity, disrupting your focus and putting you off your game.
But it isn’t enough just to learn how to manage others’ negativity in your personal life. Ignoring it or cutting the person out of your life doesn’t address the root of the problem–and it will leave your loved one spiraling deeper into chaos.
Here are some ways you can deal with negative people in your life–and help them become the best people they can be.
5 Ways to Help Someone Who is Always Negative
If you’ve been dealing with negative people in your life, you know that they’re not the most enjoyable to be around.
No matter what you say or how you try to approach the problem, they have a way of spinning things in a negative direction. Even if they’re just down on themselves all the time, it can feel tiring just to spend time with them.
Negativity isn’t a character trait–it’s a learned attitude. You can train your brain to think more positively, and the benefits extend to all aspects of your life.
Don’t let your loved one sink deeper into negativity. Here are 5 ways you can help someone pull themselves into a healthier, more positive mindset.
1. Don’t Confront Them
It doesn’t help to get caught up in a debate with a negative person.
Having a negative mindset usually means that the person is stubborn and holds on very tightly to their views. They aren’t going to change their mind just because of what you say.
If you confront them and get involved in an argument, the discussion will spiral into more and more negativity. Not only will this make the person more negative, but it will pull you down in the process.
You can give constructive comments, but it’s best not to engage any further than that.
2. Set Boundaries
Even though you want to help the negative person in your life, it’s not all on you. If you’re in a conversation that’s going down a negative path, don’t feel pressured to sit and listen to it.
You need to set boundaries and establish limits to what you’ll put up with. If you need time to put distance between yourself and the individual, make that clear to them.
You can’t change their behavior directly, but you can decide not to engage instead. The negative person may begin to realize that they’re losing your time and attention because of their negativity.
3. Empathize with Them
This person’s negative behavior isn’t coming from nowhere. A lot of people are pessimistic as a way of crying for help.
Don’t encourage their negativity, but sit down with them and offer a sympathetic ear. Just by listening to them without offering solutions on what they should do, you can help them work off some of their frustrations.
Addressing the emotional root of their negativity is the first step towards correcting it.
4. Don’t Feed Into It
While you shouldn’t directly confront their negativity, you need to make sure you’re not feeding into it. You can discourage the behavior just by ignoring the negative comments.
If the conversation starts to turn negative, either ignore the negative comments or respond with a simple, “Okay.”
Don’t agree, sympathize with them, or add anything onto it. The point is to not give them attention or validation when they’re starting to become overly negative.
When they do say things that are positive, respond with enthusiasm. Give them affirmation and add on to their statements.
If you keep this up long enough, the negative person will learn that positive behaviors are tolerated and encouraged.
5. Demonstrate Positivity
You can’t force somebody to be more positive, but you can help bring them to a more positive place. Lead by example and demonstrate positivity when you’re around them.
This doesn’t mean you can’t complain about things, but you need to show them that you’re always looking on the bright side. Even if you say you hate your job, add that you still really like your coworkers or that you’re thinking of talking to your boss about how to improve working conditions.
If things are getting too negative, bring in a new topic to lighten the mood. No matter what you’re talking about, you need to be a beacon of positive, constructive thinking.
Bringing More Positivity Into Your Life
An obvious solution to stop negativity from taking over your life is to just walk away from the person bringing you down. But that’s easier said than done–we can’t walk away from loved ones like parents, siblings, spouses, or friends with a bad attitude.
You have the power to help them change. It just takes time, persistence, and a lot of patience.
Helping others overcome their negativity also takes some humility. No matter who you are–or how positive you are–everybody has a seed of negativity in their own behavior.
Even as you’re trying to help someone who is always negative in your life, in the process, you’ll be addressing your own negativity too.
Need more advice on living a healthy, positive life? Check out our self improvement articles for more!